Question 6

Question 6

What is it that motivates me?

The answer to this one is simple:

Love.

Love in its many, various forms.
Of these 3, two are most prevalent.
Passion love-
Friend love-
(the third, physical love, also has its important place, but not in my motivations unless specific requirements are met)

Friend love:
The interaction between people is a main motivation in my life. I want to find out why people are the way they are. What pushes them. How to understand them. How to relate to them. That's why some people say that i'm a good listener: everything matters. Flaws, quirks, good times, problems... all help in the understanding of a person, and all are part of my goal.
Hmm... how to explain?
Each person contains a goal. And that goal is to know the person well enough to be considered a good friend. To always be able to relate and share.
If you're reading this, and i know you, then you are also part of my goal. You've taken the time to try to find out about who i am, i will therefore return the favor in earnest and sincerity. Not out of a form of abligation or to "return the favor", no. Just because that's who i am. This is what i do with my life.

Note:
I'm crazy enough to spell my life out like this. Bar nothing, trust all completely. If i have no secrets, what point is there in trying to undermine me? There is no need for gossip. Anything good or bad you want to know about me i will gladly share.
Of course i don't expect this of others. It takes a long time to win someone's trust, and i will be normal in trying to get to know you better and earn your trust.

Passion love:
It would help to read the monologue i wrote to understand a bit more about this. (will post this up next)
Since 12, (with of course an increasing amount of seriousness) i have waited for "her".
At first, she was whoever i liked at the time.
Then she was projected onto my first girlfriend.
Then the second.
Now i don't dare to judge or take a guess at who she might be anymore. I will leave that to God's will, as i'm sure he has the right person for me lurking somewhere. ;) Therefore the empty chair in the monologue.

I may have met her already. I may meet her in 10 years, who knows?
I'll only be sure the moment that we're walking down the aisle together, Our hands entwined around the new rings that shine so brightly.
I'd do anything to find out who she was... but it's frustrating that the only true proof is time, and you can't hurry that up. All i can do is choose wisely, and hope that she will be the next one.

It kills me, not knowing. And at the same time, it's oddly enticing.
Do i know her? Is she reading this now?
Are you reading this now?