Lost. Pacified. Hated. (2/3)

They got out of the car.
Smiles and words came easily as they walked the fair distance that separated them from their destination... A confusing exit from the badly organized carpark, a semi-silent walk down calm streets, the café came into view.
Entering, they sat down opposite each other at a small round table and took stock of their surroundings. Pictures of foods and drinks, the famous "white coffee" that had popularized the place, and the unmistakable aroma of freshly brewed coffee beans. He was about to raise his hand in signal for a menu when she silently laughed and put his hand back down. With a confidence that could only come from experience, she reached out and grabbed a small piece of paper that he'd so far ignored. Along with a pencil, she quickly wrote down their orders and passed it to one of the staff walking by.
Smiling and shaking his head silently in embarrassment, he tried to communicate his inexperience through hand movements and mouthed words.
It must have looked ridiculous, because it ignited another silent laugh from her, as well as a beautiful smile.

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"Will you kiss me?"
That was last week. A quick escape was made by kissing her hand and saying that he wasn't ready.
Was he really not ready yet? How long had they been an official couple?
Abstract thoughts of their 2 year friendship and 3 month relationship flew through his mind. He was ready... just... scared.
The first kiss. What was it? The breaking of a veil and the discovery of a new world? A physical touch between two people's lips? An emotional response stronger than any words?
Yeah... he was definitely scared.
Her room was really quiet. Sitting there, side by side on the floor, with their backs resting against the bed, they contemplated what to do next.
His lips were dry. Again.
Again and again he would pass his tongue over his lips, trying to keep some moisture on them long enough to kiss her.
He looked at her and then the floor. More silence followed.
It'd been over 30 minutes. 30 minutes of anticipation, of fear, of curiosity.
He looked at her again, and didn't look away.
He moved just a little closer to her, softly caressed her left cheek with his hand... briefly paused to moisten his already dry lips... and...
Kissed her.
His top lip over hers, softly brushing each other as their eyes closed... One time, twice, a brief withdrawal to look into her eyes, and another slow, soft light kiss.
Light flashed in the room and the world returned as they realized that it was raining outside. The noise of falling water creating little ripples of sound that couldn't begin to compare with the waves of happiness emanating from the young couple.
She looked at him again, smiling and almost crying, and asked him if he wanted to kiss her on the roof, in the rain.
He took her hand, and they ran to the roof.
Stepping out into the heavy rain, cold washed over them as their clothes were drenched and the wind whipped around them.
Careless? Oblivious.
Lightning struck again and provided a heavenly backlight to the two intertwined figures standing on the roof.
Rain fell, the sky thundered, the world spun around them in the chaotic dance of the storm, but even as wind froze their bodies to the bone, they were happy.
Warm, and happy.

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He was sitting at the bus stop, alone, and looked blankly ahead.
Cars passed by, a constant drone that kept him from being totally alone. Tired of waiting for his bus, he looked around him at the overhead highway, the people, and then back at the street.
But... the street was empty. Dark, with the street lights on, he was sitting next to her again.
Waiting for a taxi to get back home from her apartment, he had looked up at the silent highway overhead, then back at her, and smiled.
The taxi came... A few more words were spoken... and a beautiful hug was given.
A long look accompanied by a smile, he got in the taxi, closed the door, and-
Cars rushed by. Colors... reality came back.
Fuck. Just another memory of the past to haunt him.

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A long moment of silence. The fist against the wall started shaking slightly as a small tendril of blood dripped down from it and ran along the broken tiles. The hand came slowly back, and he stared at it in disbelief as he looked at the blood and porcelain that covered his knuckles.
One of the guys there said "What the heck are you doing?" and rushed to get him some bandages.
He knew though... he knew that she understood.
But she was quiet, looked at him but said nothing.
The fist clenched.

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He looked at his right hand and noticed a scar between his fingers. Smiling, he reminisced on the good memories of times past.

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